MOR-TI-FYING! I tell you girls, it is!
So I'm not a BIP (Breastfeeder In Public), but I don't judge those who do. I am really not discreet and neither is my son. For one, I don't know how to get him on the nozzle without showing everyone else my business. Two, my child makes all kinds of noises while he breastfeeds. Lastly, he is a wiggler and will wiggle right off exposing me for all to see.
I have known professional BIPers. Including this woman in church this last Sunday who straight up successfully pulled off a BIP during the sermon. Noone would have know, seriously. The only reason I knew was because I am a BM (Breastfeeding Mother).
This is relevant just to give you an idea that this part of my daily routine is rather private. On occasion of necessity I do pump, but this is not for enertainment or discussion...just necessity. Mind you, I have NEVER done this in front of anyone else, including my husband. We would rather him not to have that kind of visual of the "girls." We're trying to keep it sexy or as much as possible all things considering.
So yesterday the little man was not as hungry as usual, so I thought to myself, "self, its a good time to store up." I closed the door, put the man on the floor to play in his room, and then both girls went to work.
At that point, Regina, who works at the ranch, WALKS INTO ISAAC'S ROOM! First off, it was hard to hear her walk in because you know the loud noise those machines make. Then, once she was in my presence, I was so shocked I didn't move. She says, "Ohh!" and then proceeds to tell me in her best spanglish how good that is for the baby. Then, she comes NEARER to check out the pump. She also told me how she breastfed her oldest son until he was three. He would go out to play and then come in and lift up her shirt. He would say, "mommy milk." Can this wait until I am not chestly exposed...?
I know you are thinking, why in the world did you not unload yourself from that machine rather than letting Regina see the girls in their milking glory!?! I DO NOT KNOW!
I was just mortified.
So now I'm officially a PIPer (pumper in public).